It’s not unusual for teenagers to be rebellious, moody, and even angry sometimes. But what should parents do when anger escalates into aggressive behavior? And when is aggression in teens a sign that they need treatment for a mental health condition?
Adolescents who struggle with depression, anxiety, trauma, or substance use disorders have a higher likelihood of demonstrating aggressive teenage behaviors. So it’s important for parents to understand why a teen is acting out. The more knowledge parents have about what causes aggression in teens, the better equipped they’ll be to support their children.
Key Takeaways
- There are many underlying causes of teenage aggression, including mental health issues, ADHD, learning disabilities, and substance abuse.
- Parents can help their aggressive teens by using calm body language and active listening.
- A mental health assessment can help determine whether aggression in teens is caused by underlying depression, trauma, anxiety, or another condition.
- Newport Academy treats the root causes of aggression using a trauma-informed, integrated approach.
What Is Aggressive Behavior in Teens?
Teen aggression may manifest in different ways, including verbal aggression, physical violence, and anti-social behavior. Aggressive teenage behaviors can include:
- Shouting
- Cursing
- Verbally abusive language like sarcasm and insults
- Physical violence
- Out-of-control behaviors like staying out all night
- Bullying and cyberbullying
- Gossiping and spreading rumors
- Damaging property (keying cars, slashing tires, etc.)
Types of Aggression in Teens
Teen aggression is sometimes categorized as either impulsive aggression or instrumental aggression.
- Impulsive aggression is also known as affective aggression or emotional aggression. It is usually uncontrollable and spontaneous.
- Instrumental aggression is also known as cognitive aggression. In these cases, a teen has a plan, intention, or goal in mind for aggressive behavior.
Impulsive teen aggression examples might be shoving a sibling when they’re frustrated or yelling at a parent when they can’t clearly express what they’re feeling.
An example of instrumental aggression could be repeated mean girl behaviors within a friend (or frenemy) group.
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The Consequences of Teenage Aggression
When a teen demonstrates aggression toward peers, family members, or adults in positions of authority, there are usually consequences of some kind. If the aggression takes place at school, they could be sent to detention, suspended, or even expelled. Teen aggression with peers can harm friendships or romantic relationships. If a teen is aggressive or violent at home, the parents and family members involved have a decision to make about the consequences they want to put into place.
Regardless of whether a teen’s aggressive behavior is violent or not, parents should take acts of teenage aggression seriously. Even if a teen is “just” talking back, parents need to set consequences and help teens get to the root of their aggressive behavior. Aggression causes harm not just to the victim of the assault or aggression, but also to the teen demonstrating the behavior. Teens may be demonstrating aggressive behavior as an unhealthy way of coping with distress and difficult emotions.
Causes of Aggression in Adolescence
As we have discussed, aggression in teens can be a symptom of mental health issues, especially in adolescent males. Because boys and young men are socialized to “be tough” and not show vulnerability, they tend to avoid showing or talking about emotions like sadness or fear. As a result, their feelings may manifest as anger or aggression. However, it’s not just boys who demonstrate aggressive teen behavior.
Some specific causes of aggression include:
- ADHD
- Mood disorders
- Behavioral disorders (including conduct disorder)
- Learning disabilities
- Autism Spectrum Disorder
- Traumatic brain injuries (TBIs)
- History of physical or sexual abuse
- Addiction to drugs or alcohol
Let’s take a closer look at some of these aggression causes and how they impact adolescent mental health. These underlying issues can also help answer the question parents often ask: “Why is my teen so angry?”
ADHD and Learning Disabilities
If a child has ADHD, they are more likely to act impulsively and aggressively without heeding the potential consequences. ADHD and learning disabilities can leave a teen feeling frustrated and bad about themselves. And if they haven’t been given tools for coping with these emotions, they might end up lashing out at others.
Neurodivergence and Brain Trauma
Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) can include aggressive behavior. Similar behavior can be seen in teens who have a traumatic brain injury (TBI). Concussions and brain damage can cause teens to act out in violent and aggressive ways.
Mood Disorders
Adolescents who have mood disorders such as bipolar disorder may demonstrate aggression during a manic or hypomanic episode.
Mental Health and Aggression in Teens
Children with a history of physical or sexual abuse are more likely to demonstrate aggression as a teen or adult. Childhood trauma also contributes to other mental health issues, such as anxiety and depression, that can manifest as teen aggression.
Teen Substance Abuse
Teen brain function is impacted by the early use of drugs and alcohol. Consequently, substance abuse can cause increased aggression in teens.
How to Cope with Aggression in Teens
It can be frustrating, stressful, and scary to parent a teen who is demonstrating aggressive or violent behaviors. Although parents can’t control their teenagers’ behavior, they can control the way they respond to aggression and violence. Here are some ways to cope with aggression in teens.
Use calm body language
Nonverbal cues, including body language, are often more impactful ways of communicating than talking. Parents who are struggling with aggressive teenagers can help de-escalate tense situations by using body language and stances that are open, calm, and non-confrontational. Crossed arms, shifting back and forth, breathing fast, huffing and puffing, and eye-rolling are a few examples of nonverbal communication that isn’t helpful when dealing with an aggressive teenager.
Model appropriate behaviors
Parents are role models for their children. As a result, when parents yell and scream, teens are more likely to pick fights, talk back, and argue. If you keep your cool and avoid raising your voice or insulting your teen, they are more likely to respond in the same way. Model appropriate ways to communicate by interacting with your teen the way you want them to interact with you.
Allow the teen to share their point of view
Teens feel understood and accepted when their parents listen to them. Active listening is one way to show a teenager who is demonstrating aggressive behaviors that what they say will be taken seriously. When parents let their children express their points of view and truly listen, teen aggression typically becomes less frequent and less intense.
Regulate your own nervous system
When a teen gets worked up and is acting impulsively and aggressively, parents need to stay calm and de-escalate the aggressive situation. To overcome the stress response that fires up in the face of teen aggression, parents can activate the relaxation response using practices such as deep breathing. Try the Square Breathing exercise: inhale for a count of four, hold for a count of four, exhale for a count of four, hold for a count of four, and repeat. You can also try inhaling for a count of five and exhaling for a count of seven.
Give teens skills for anger management
Defiant teenagers who demonstrate aggressive behaviors and struggle with controlling their anger can benefit from anger management, perhaps in an adolescent support group. They can learn emotional regulation skills and anger management techniques for dealing with the uncontrollable anger that can result in teen aggression. Sometimes parents attend anger management groups alongside their teens so the whole family gains new tools to support greater harmony in the home.
Seek mental health support
A mental health assessment can help determine whether aggression in a teen is caused by underlying depression, anxiety, PTSD, ASD, or other issues. A mental health professional can also give the family recommendations and information about treatment options. Addressing the root cause of aggression will support teens to reduce aggressive behaviors. And more important, treatment will give teens the support they need to heal and succeed in other areas of life as well.
Treatment for the Root Causes of Teenage Aggression
At Newport Academy, we work with teens and their families who are struggling with mental health issues. We help teens manage their anger by treating the root causes of aggression rather than just the behaviors, including mood disorders, conduct disorders, behavioral disorders, and substance use disorders. Our clinical model uncovers and heals trauma, as well as teaching healthy coping skills and strengthening emotional regulation.
Each teen’s tailored treatment plan includes individual therapy, group therapy, CBT, DBT, and EMDR. Attachment-Based Family Therapy is a foundation of our treatment, to help teens and parents rebuild trust and respect that may have been damaged by a teen’s aggressive or violent behavior. We also provide experiential modalities like Adventure Therapy and Mixed Martial Arts that allow teens to work out energy and aggression in productive and safe ways.
Contact us today to schedule a consultation and learn more about how we can help your teen and your family.
Frequently Asked Questions
Sources
J Gen Intern Med. 2003 Oct; 18(10): 864–870.
